It seems Ive seen this way before, we act dis contagious. But I'm not running anymore, when life gets outrageous. You bide your time by getting by, falling in weakness. I waste my time to wonder why, cause I cant believe this. At sudden times I've hit the floor, I'm turning the pages. Its not funny anymore, the fits and the rages. I bide my time by getting by, Cause I've done and seen this. I'm wasting time, I wonder why, cause I have believed this. Could you waste my day here anymore? I don't wanna take it. And I'm not at play here anymore. Makes no since to fake it. Thoughts have changed, I've rearranged. Now I have a vision. I fought the thoughts back till I'm sane. Now I'm on a mission. You breathe, you bide, you're slipping by, your image is weakness. You're wasting time here by my side, but now I can see this. Could you waste my day here anymore? I don't wanna take it, I'm not at play here anymore makes no since to fake it. Could you waste my day here anymore? i don't wanna take it. I'm not at play here anymore makes no since to fake it. I've done my time now leave me alone. Committed no crime so I break these chains, I'm free. If passions a crime then throw me a bone. Ive done nothing wrong so please get away, get away, get away, from me. Could you waste my day here anymore? I don't wanna take it. and I'm not at play here anymore, I don't wanna fake it.
Late,
Kelly K
Monday, January 22, 2007
Drama with Capitol C...
Ok, so heres what I've learned. When massive amounts of drama follow someone....like, they always have an excuse for you due to some insane situation involving them or friends.... yeah, its not REALLY drama... Its called LIES! I cant stand it! Just tell me the freaking truth! Ill appreciate the honesty a lot more! Yeah, it may not be fun to hear but at least i can deal with it! Dont use me for my money, my friends, my "hook-ups" whatever.....Dont use me, dont lie to me. Just say hey Kelly, I dont REALLY like you but i want all you have to offer...... That'll make more since to me!!! HA! And to think I just thought you were hard to read! HARD TO READ, MY ASS!!!! I couldn't read you or figure you out because you were full of lies!!! And to think i wasted MY time on YOU. Whatever, I'm out.
Late,
Kelly K
Late,
Kelly K
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Road Trip...
OK.....So one of the bands we manage, RED, broke down about a month ago in Boise Idaho while they were on tour. When this happened they had to ride in another tour bus with another band. In doing so, they had to leave there trailer and there gear in Idaho. Well, they finished the tour by using the other bands gear. No problem. Well, now the tour was over. They needed to get there gear home. So we start price checking on how much it will cost to have a company bring the trailer back to Nashville. (thats where the band lives)
Well, we find out the cheapest we can get a company to do it for is about 4 grand. So were like, no forget that!!.... So we start trying to find a cheaper way to go about it... Well, as you have probably already guessed... I got elected to do the deed.
So that night, at 10pm I leave Midland and head to Oklahoma City where i was gonna Pick up a truck and my boy Ricky to help me out. I had no clue that this 4000mile trip was going to take over 94hrs. I was unprepared!!!
Anyway, I get to Oklahoma City around 5am Ricky was still awake. I was like dude, you need to get some rest cause im tired!!! im gonna make you drive!!! He said he was good. so whatever.... I went to sleep and got up at 8am. We left Ricks house and headed to Stillwater to pick up the truck. And just as I thought, as soon as we start driving to Stillwater Rick is out cold!! im like, blah, im so tired and this fool is sleeping!!! We get the Truck, and we start heading toward Idaho.....
Stillwater to Idaho is a 25hr drive by the way. The first 18 hours weren't so bad! We were talkin and havin a pretty good time! We stopped in LoveLand Colorado. Now let me tell you, I dont know if it was just the restaurant we stopped at or the whole town, but that is where God hid all the Beautiful ladies!!! It was insane!!! .....Note to self, Move to LoveLand!
Ok i know this is boring..... So ill just jump to We got the trailer..... and we drove 35hrs to Nashville.
Now, just a couple of notes here......
1.Ricky didn't tell anyone he was leaving and didnt bring a cell phone charger...You can imagine how this scenario goes...
2. We were in a truck for 90hrs without stopping. No showers.... Did not smell well in the truck by the 3rd day....... not good.
3. Kelly cant sleep well in cars...... So at one point Kelly decided to take just half of a pack of Tylenol PM. He thought he would just sleep a few hours then let Rick sleep....... Kelly slept for 9hrs. Poor Rick, Drove all the way across Nebraska alone at night....
4. If Rick Isnt driving....Hes sleeping.... He doesnt talk to you!! ha ha
Ok... So anyway, we Drop the trailer Off with RED and we head back home...... Wait... Did I mention we got to stop in MO. and See Tyler?? yeah well, we did. Which was Rad cause I haven't seen that fool in about 7 months. Anyway, good times were had.....
So heading back into Oklahoma I see a Casino i have never gone too. So we HAD to stop... I mean come on!! So we went in for 45min. And i left with an extra $500!! not a bad stop if I do say so Myself!! Anyway we made it back to Oklahoma around 8pm on Monday..... It was a crazy trip!!!
Of course I'm leaving out TONS of stories and Details..... but then this would be even longer and more boring!!! so anyway..... Crossing 15states.... 4000Miles.....in over 90hrs.....
LATER!!!
Kelly K
Here are a few pictures from the trip......
HERE IS THE TRUCK AND TRAILOR......
RICK DRIVING.......
RICK NOT DRIVING............
RICK NOT DRIVING AGAIN......
CALL IT WHAT YOU WILL................
THE EVER POPULAR TYLER.......
TRYING TO KILL THE EVER POPULAR TYLER........
THATS TYLERS CAR FOLLOWING US, NOT IMPORTANT, BUT HEY, WE TOOK THE PICTURE, MIGHT AS WELL USE IT.....
NOTICE, WHEN PULLING A TRAILER WE ONLY GOT ABOUT 8MPG.... WE SPENT OVER $900 ON GAS!!!
AND THIS IS JUST A PICTURE I HAD OF TYLER KISSING A MANIKIN.....
DISCLAIMER........ we dont look to great in these pictures because we were tired, dirty and just plain HAGGARD!!!
Well, we find out the cheapest we can get a company to do it for is about 4 grand. So were like, no forget that!!.... So we start trying to find a cheaper way to go about it... Well, as you have probably already guessed... I got elected to do the deed.
So that night, at 10pm I leave Midland and head to Oklahoma City where i was gonna Pick up a truck and my boy Ricky to help me out. I had no clue that this 4000mile trip was going to take over 94hrs. I was unprepared!!!
Anyway, I get to Oklahoma City around 5am Ricky was still awake. I was like dude, you need to get some rest cause im tired!!! im gonna make you drive!!! He said he was good. so whatever.... I went to sleep and got up at 8am. We left Ricks house and headed to Stillwater to pick up the truck. And just as I thought, as soon as we start driving to Stillwater Rick is out cold!! im like, blah, im so tired and this fool is sleeping!!! We get the Truck, and we start heading toward Idaho.....
Stillwater to Idaho is a 25hr drive by the way. The first 18 hours weren't so bad! We were talkin and havin a pretty good time! We stopped in LoveLand Colorado. Now let me tell you, I dont know if it was just the restaurant we stopped at or the whole town, but that is where God hid all the Beautiful ladies!!! It was insane!!! .....Note to self, Move to LoveLand!
Ok i know this is boring..... So ill just jump to We got the trailer..... and we drove 35hrs to Nashville.
Now, just a couple of notes here......
1.Ricky didn't tell anyone he was leaving and didnt bring a cell phone charger...You can imagine how this scenario goes...
2. We were in a truck for 90hrs without stopping. No showers.... Did not smell well in the truck by the 3rd day....... not good.
3. Kelly cant sleep well in cars...... So at one point Kelly decided to take just half of a pack of Tylenol PM. He thought he would just sleep a few hours then let Rick sleep....... Kelly slept for 9hrs. Poor Rick, Drove all the way across Nebraska alone at night....
4. If Rick Isnt driving....Hes sleeping.... He doesnt talk to you!! ha ha
Ok... So anyway, we Drop the trailer Off with RED and we head back home...... Wait... Did I mention we got to stop in MO. and See Tyler?? yeah well, we did. Which was Rad cause I haven't seen that fool in about 7 months. Anyway, good times were had.....
So heading back into Oklahoma I see a Casino i have never gone too. So we HAD to stop... I mean come on!! So we went in for 45min. And i left with an extra $500!! not a bad stop if I do say so Myself!! Anyway we made it back to Oklahoma around 8pm on Monday..... It was a crazy trip!!!
Of course I'm leaving out TONS of stories and Details..... but then this would be even longer and more boring!!! so anyway..... Crossing 15states.... 4000Miles.....in over 90hrs.....
LATER!!!
Kelly K
Here are a few pictures from the trip......
HERE IS THE TRUCK AND TRAILOR......
RICK DRIVING.......
RICK NOT DRIVING............
RICK NOT DRIVING AGAIN......
CALL IT WHAT YOU WILL................
THE EVER POPULAR TYLER.......
TRYING TO KILL THE EVER POPULAR TYLER........
THATS TYLERS CAR FOLLOWING US, NOT IMPORTANT, BUT HEY, WE TOOK THE PICTURE, MIGHT AS WELL USE IT.....
NOTICE, WHEN PULLING A TRAILER WE ONLY GOT ABOUT 8MPG.... WE SPENT OVER $900 ON GAS!!!
AND THIS IS JUST A PICTURE I HAD OF TYLER KISSING A MANIKIN.....
DISCLAIMER........ we dont look to great in these pictures because we were tired, dirty and just plain HAGGARD!!!
Reflections.....
Weird day.... Lots of thoughts and emotions.... Sorry, this is more for me than you. But take what you will......
And everybody knows that the plague is coming, Everybody knows that its moving fast. Everybody knows that the naked man and woman, Are just a shining artifact of the past. Everybody knows the scene is dead. But theres gonna be a meter on your bed That will disclose What everybody knows.
Dad, your boy is about to fall. He walks the razor's edge. He's on the brink of fading out. He's at his bitter end. Dad, your boy who used to run, you taught him how to crawl. He left home to find his own, now all he had is gone. In your eyes I see a darkness that torments you
and in your head where it dwells. I'd give you my hand if you'd reach out and grab it. Let's walk away from this hell.
What's the deal with my brain? Why am I so obviously insane? In a perfect situation I let love down the drain. There's the pitch, slow and straight. All I have to do is swing and I'm a hero, but I'm a zero.
It's nothing I'll forget when the moon gets tired. You are stuck to me everyday, Believe in what I am because it's all I have today. And tomorrow who knows where we'll be. From here I can hardly see a thing But I will follow anyone who brings me to you.
Well first things first, we've gotta find a way To make the beauty of the nighttime last all day. We'll do our very best to keep our appetites in check. You better watch your back, we want your neck
Nothing but rotten apples lay here light years from the tree. Got thrown out of the house at the ripe age of three. I'll do my very best to keep my feelings off my chest, And out of your neck.
Yo, get out the get out the way of the money man. Ladies know I'm dope, so consider me contraband. Fella's are just jealous, cuz they're ponies and I'm mustang. Don't try to hang cuz I'm out with a big bang. Get get down, all the ladies wanna be with me. Get get down, all the fellas compete with me. Get get down, and I know that I'm trippin, but I really don't care cuz this is how I'm livin'.
Now tickets to concerts and drinking at clubs, Sometimes for music that you haven't even heard of. And how much did you pay for your rock'n'roll t-shirt
That proves you were there, That you heard of them first? How do you afford your rock'n'roll lifestyle?
Tossing turning roll away, Indecision won't you ever make up your mind.
Lifetime Nighttime wake the day Cause tomorrow will see if you've had your fill of sympathy. Will you never cease to be the glutton of sympathy?
Don't you know the stars are all fading let the sunshine capture the sparkle
of your smile.
LATE
Kelly K
Sometimes I cant say it so well.....but you can.
And everybody knows that the plague is coming, Everybody knows that its moving fast. Everybody knows that the naked man and woman, Are just a shining artifact of the past. Everybody knows the scene is dead. But theres gonna be a meter on your bed That will disclose What everybody knows.
Dad, your boy is about to fall. He walks the razor's edge. He's on the brink of fading out. He's at his bitter end. Dad, your boy who used to run, you taught him how to crawl. He left home to find his own, now all he had is gone. In your eyes I see a darkness that torments you
and in your head where it dwells. I'd give you my hand if you'd reach out and grab it. Let's walk away from this hell.
What's the deal with my brain? Why am I so obviously insane? In a perfect situation I let love down the drain. There's the pitch, slow and straight. All I have to do is swing and I'm a hero, but I'm a zero.
It's nothing I'll forget when the moon gets tired. You are stuck to me everyday, Believe in what I am because it's all I have today. And tomorrow who knows where we'll be. From here I can hardly see a thing But I will follow anyone who brings me to you.
Well first things first, we've gotta find a way To make the beauty of the nighttime last all day. We'll do our very best to keep our appetites in check. You better watch your back, we want your neck
Nothing but rotten apples lay here light years from the tree. Got thrown out of the house at the ripe age of three. I'll do my very best to keep my feelings off my chest, And out of your neck.
Yo, get out the get out the way of the money man. Ladies know I'm dope, so consider me contraband. Fella's are just jealous, cuz they're ponies and I'm mustang. Don't try to hang cuz I'm out with a big bang. Get get down, all the ladies wanna be with me. Get get down, all the fellas compete with me. Get get down, and I know that I'm trippin, but I really don't care cuz this is how I'm livin'.
Now tickets to concerts and drinking at clubs, Sometimes for music that you haven't even heard of. And how much did you pay for your rock'n'roll t-shirt
That proves you were there, That you heard of them first? How do you afford your rock'n'roll lifestyle?
Tossing turning roll away, Indecision won't you ever make up your mind.
Lifetime Nighttime wake the day Cause tomorrow will see if you've had your fill of sympathy. Will you never cease to be the glutton of sympathy?
Don't you know the stars are all fading let the sunshine capture the sparkle
of your smile.
LATE
Kelly K
Sometimes I cant say it so well.....but you can.
A Letter...If you will
Dear Fergie Ferg,
First off let me say I do like the tune of your song London Bridge. It is in fact on my IPOD. I dont even like this style of music, yet, It's a good dance tune. Congrats.
The lyrics are another story. Why I am even analyzing dance song lyrics is a mystery to me as well. Ever since Get out of my dreams and into my car by Billy Ocean, I gave up on finding meaning to pop songs. However I am particularly "tickled" if you will, by your words. Not that i want to blast the song in my car, but if i did, I still cant condone the promotion of such non-sensical word play.
Just so I am clear your "London Bridge" are your panties? If this is true then the singular paired with plural is my first area of concern.
Secondly on the "Big in 06" awards you were introduced by Lance Bass saying " this song has made the London Bridge the most visited tourist site in London" (or something to that degree, my apologies for not getting it down on paper verbatim). I hate to be the one to break it you Ferg but the actual London Bridge is in Lake Havasu, AZ. The bridge you are standing in front of in your promo materials for "London Bridge" is actually the Tower Bridge in London. Boy oh boy, what a blunder. No worries though. I ain't no history buff myself.
Sorry, I didn't mean to be an a-hole, nit picking on the geography facts of a hit song.
Geographically correct or not, at least "London Bridge" has some sting and Fergie, I like me some sting. I do not however like it when people take their names and make them into songs like "Fergalicious." It just makes me uncomfortable. It also sounds creepingly like MC Hammers "Hammer Time." I hear it and immediately the two songs blend:
Fergalicious (Fergalicious)
But I ain't promiscuous
And if you was suspicious
All that shit is fictitious
I blow kisses (mmmwwahhh)
It's Hammer go Hammer MC Hammer Yo Hammer and the rest can go and play
Can't touch this (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh) Can't touch this (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
But honestly none of this is really of bother to you. I just wanted to let you know about that London Bridge thing as I hate it when I say something only to later find out it was wrong and none of my friends corrected me. Not to say we are friends. I mean I'll gladly be your friend. OMG are we now friends? Let me know cause I am sending out my holiday cards soon and need to know if I should save one for Ferg, Fergie, Fergy Ferg, Fergalicious, or Stacey Fergerson. (Dang girl! you are becoming the P-diddy/Diddy/Puffy/Puff Daddy/Sean Combs of white girls)
Love Always,
Kelly K
First off let me say I do like the tune of your song London Bridge. It is in fact on my IPOD. I dont even like this style of music, yet, It's a good dance tune. Congrats.
The lyrics are another story. Why I am even analyzing dance song lyrics is a mystery to me as well. Ever since Get out of my dreams and into my car by Billy Ocean, I gave up on finding meaning to pop songs. However I am particularly "tickled" if you will, by your words. Not that i want to blast the song in my car, but if i did, I still cant condone the promotion of such non-sensical word play.
Just so I am clear your "London Bridge" are your panties? If this is true then the singular paired with plural is my first area of concern.
Secondly on the "Big in 06" awards you were introduced by Lance Bass saying " this song has made the London Bridge the most visited tourist site in London" (or something to that degree, my apologies for not getting it down on paper verbatim). I hate to be the one to break it you Ferg but the actual London Bridge is in Lake Havasu, AZ. The bridge you are standing in front of in your promo materials for "London Bridge" is actually the Tower Bridge in London. Boy oh boy, what a blunder. No worries though. I ain't no history buff myself.
Sorry, I didn't mean to be an a-hole, nit picking on the geography facts of a hit song.
Geographically correct or not, at least "London Bridge" has some sting and Fergie, I like me some sting. I do not however like it when people take their names and make them into songs like "Fergalicious." It just makes me uncomfortable. It also sounds creepingly like MC Hammers "Hammer Time." I hear it and immediately the two songs blend:
Fergalicious (Fergalicious)
But I ain't promiscuous
And if you was suspicious
All that shit is fictitious
I blow kisses (mmmwwahhh)
It's Hammer go Hammer MC Hammer Yo Hammer and the rest can go and play
Can't touch this (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh) Can't touch this (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
But honestly none of this is really of bother to you. I just wanted to let you know about that London Bridge thing as I hate it when I say something only to later find out it was wrong and none of my friends corrected me. Not to say we are friends. I mean I'll gladly be your friend. OMG are we now friends? Let me know cause I am sending out my holiday cards soon and need to know if I should save one for Ferg, Fergie, Fergy Ferg, Fergalicious, or Stacey Fergerson. (Dang girl! you are becoming the P-diddy/Diddy/Puffy/Puff Daddy/Sean Combs of white girls)
Love Always,
Kelly K
Midland TX...No Thanks!
BLAH!!! so what do you write when nothing exciting is going on!!! And not just nothing exciting....nothing at all!!!!! Ok for reals.... I LOVE my job, but I HATE Midland!!! For reals yo!!! like, I used to complain about OKC a lot, but man, i would do anything to have our office there!!! I mean, for sure id rather live in like, LA or Chicago or somthin like that.... But NOT Midland!!! Now, dont get me wrong, Ive made some GREAT friends here, and I love em to death!!! But i still get so freakin bored!!!
Here, I can give you a little inside look into Midland. Here are just a few facts and observations Ive found since living here these last 5 or 6 months.....
1. If your a female over 20 you have AT LEAST 1 Kid.
2. People can only give you directions from "the Loop"
3. If you wanna go out, EVER, you have to go to a bar.
4. All these bars, are karaoke Bars....
5. Everyone thinks they are the karaoke GOD given to us from Jesus himself and we ALL are Dying to hear them sing.....but were not.....were just dying.....
6. Girls at these "said" bars, with 2 kids at home... only like you when your singing karaoke, any other time they ignore you.
7. I guess no one told the "great" people of Midland that Cowboy hats with the sides smashed as tight as possible to the middle of the hat, are not cool. In fact a little skinny cowboy hat is just stupid and makes you look gay.
8. Yield in Midland means, "Hey, what the hell did that sign say... oh hell! I almost hit that car!! Shoot......."
9. The word "PUNK" means nothing here....they've never even heard of it..
10. Ok, this is one of my favorites..... Poker is illegal in TX, BUT you can play free tournaments with no money involved anytime. So these "famous" Midland bars offer free poker EVERY NIGHT...... but be prepared to play against the 90 something year-old ladies who use Magnum condoms as there "Lucky Tokens".... Im tellin you, the sight of this will make you fold your cards instantly......
So anyway... Theres a few facts about this Great place that i will NEVER call home!!! blah, I'm ready to come back to Oklahoma for a weekend. Or maybe some of you just need to come visit me!! yeah, good Idea!! Come help ME!!!
Later!
Kelly K
Here, I can give you a little inside look into Midland. Here are just a few facts and observations Ive found since living here these last 5 or 6 months.....
1. If your a female over 20 you have AT LEAST 1 Kid.
2. People can only give you directions from "the Loop"
3. If you wanna go out, EVER, you have to go to a bar.
4. All these bars, are karaoke Bars....
5. Everyone thinks they are the karaoke GOD given to us from Jesus himself and we ALL are Dying to hear them sing.....but were not.....were just dying.....
6. Girls at these "said" bars, with 2 kids at home... only like you when your singing karaoke, any other time they ignore you.
7. I guess no one told the "great" people of Midland that Cowboy hats with the sides smashed as tight as possible to the middle of the hat, are not cool. In fact a little skinny cowboy hat is just stupid and makes you look gay.
8. Yield in Midland means, "Hey, what the hell did that sign say... oh hell! I almost hit that car!! Shoot......."
9. The word "PUNK" means nothing here....they've never even heard of it..
10. Ok, this is one of my favorites..... Poker is illegal in TX, BUT you can play free tournaments with no money involved anytime. So these "famous" Midland bars offer free poker EVERY NIGHT...... but be prepared to play against the 90 something year-old ladies who use Magnum condoms as there "Lucky Tokens".... Im tellin you, the sight of this will make you fold your cards instantly......
So anyway... Theres a few facts about this Great place that i will NEVER call home!!! blah, I'm ready to come back to Oklahoma for a weekend. Or maybe some of you just need to come visit me!! yeah, good Idea!! Come help ME!!!
Later!
Kelly K
Christmas Adventure
older blog.....
Merry Christmas to you all!!! yeah, that was a nice opener..... it felt good....
So.... Lets talk about my evening last night. Im at work and I get a phone call. Its a call letting me know that in the building down the street from mine, is having a HUGE Christmas party. So I ask, "Are we invited?" he says, "I just invited you!" I said, "But were YOU invited?" and he said, "No." But hey, who wants to let minor details ruin a good time?!? So i said......Ill think about it.
When I get off work Justin meets me at my office. See, Justin and I had planed to go to Woofers this evening.... Well, I tell Justin about the party. I tell him what i know....
1.Theres gonna be a band.
2.Free food
3.Open Bar
So we decide to head over and try it out. Just take a little look see.....
So we get there and were looking inside from a distance and I see that everyone is WAY dressed up... So if you know me, Ive got a hoodie, hat and shorts on! ha, I'm thinkin, there is no way I'm gonna be able to pull this off!!! So i call Mark, My friend who told me about the party and im like, hey man, this is like a NICE party!! I cant get in!! He replied, Sure ya can! Just do it!
Those are always great words of advice, "Just Do It".
So I did.
So Just in and I wait for the security guards to wonder away from the door and we made our entrance. But when we came in, no one was walking around talking or anything, everyone was setting at tables eating dinner. we were KINDA noticeable. So we quickly take a seat on a bench in the middle of the room and try our best to look like anonymous blender-iners......
About this time Mark shows up. Ok, so were all here, all together, lets get this thing goin..... we all walk up to the bar....Sure enough, free drinks!! score!!! not bad not bad.... We find a table. an empty table in the corner by the band, and we set up shop. We head over to the food line. and there we found Prime Rib, HUGE shrimp, Stuffed Jalapeños, Fruit, all kinds of cakes and pies... you name it, it was there!! Freakin A man!! this is a great party!!
So were all sitting at our table, eating, drinking, laughing....you know. So they start giving out prizes and were clapping for the winners, and shouting, "YEAH! way to go Jimster!!!" and things of that sort...
Then the band starts playing.....not a good band. But we see this chick, 45-55, sitting alone..... so we invite her to come sit with us! ha! Shes all dressed up nice, and were all looking like punks, but she comes over! Then she starts talking to us, and we find out, this lady is a FaReak! She all talkin about her "religion" which sounds ALOT like a cult.... Said she "did Time" in Texas for a while, shes from LA nows she dating the drummer in this crappy cover band.... on and on and on.....Crazy! now, shes nice, dont get me wrong... just hella weird. To say the least, we dug her! ha ha
So the evening is starting to come to a close, we've had many free drinks, much free food, and plenty of entertainment..... But i wasn't done yet..... there was this huge center piece on each of the tables.. and under was a name of the "Employee" who won it. Well, that employee was SUPPOSED to be sitting at that table.... well, I guess Richard Rodriguez didnt feel the need to show up to the party. That being said, I didnt feel bad walking out with his center piece! HA!
So in conclusion... I had a GREAT night with my friends, and got a nice center piece as well!! Id like to encourage you all to find a Christmas party you dont belong at, and enjoy the fun!!! Because it will be just that......Fun!
Later!
Kelly K
Merry Christmas to you all!!! yeah, that was a nice opener..... it felt good....
So.... Lets talk about my evening last night. Im at work and I get a phone call. Its a call letting me know that in the building down the street from mine, is having a HUGE Christmas party. So I ask, "Are we invited?" he says, "I just invited you!" I said, "But were YOU invited?" and he said, "No." But hey, who wants to let minor details ruin a good time?!? So i said......Ill think about it.
When I get off work Justin meets me at my office. See, Justin and I had planed to go to Woofers this evening.... Well, I tell Justin about the party. I tell him what i know....
1.Theres gonna be a band.
2.Free food
3.Open Bar
So we decide to head over and try it out. Just take a little look see.....
So we get there and were looking inside from a distance and I see that everyone is WAY dressed up... So if you know me, Ive got a hoodie, hat and shorts on! ha, I'm thinkin, there is no way I'm gonna be able to pull this off!!! So i call Mark, My friend who told me about the party and im like, hey man, this is like a NICE party!! I cant get in!! He replied, Sure ya can! Just do it!
Those are always great words of advice, "Just Do It".
So I did.
So Just in and I wait for the security guards to wonder away from the door and we made our entrance. But when we came in, no one was walking around talking or anything, everyone was setting at tables eating dinner. we were KINDA noticeable. So we quickly take a seat on a bench in the middle of the room and try our best to look like anonymous blender-iners......
About this time Mark shows up. Ok, so were all here, all together, lets get this thing goin..... we all walk up to the bar....Sure enough, free drinks!! score!!! not bad not bad.... We find a table. an empty table in the corner by the band, and we set up shop. We head over to the food line. and there we found Prime Rib, HUGE shrimp, Stuffed Jalapeños, Fruit, all kinds of cakes and pies... you name it, it was there!! Freakin A man!! this is a great party!!
So were all sitting at our table, eating, drinking, laughing....you know. So they start giving out prizes and were clapping for the winners, and shouting, "YEAH! way to go Jimster!!!" and things of that sort...
Then the band starts playing.....not a good band. But we see this chick, 45-55, sitting alone..... so we invite her to come sit with us! ha! Shes all dressed up nice, and were all looking like punks, but she comes over! Then she starts talking to us, and we find out, this lady is a FaReak! She all talkin about her "religion" which sounds ALOT like a cult.... Said she "did Time" in Texas for a while, shes from LA nows she dating the drummer in this crappy cover band.... on and on and on.....Crazy! now, shes nice, dont get me wrong... just hella weird. To say the least, we dug her! ha ha
So the evening is starting to come to a close, we've had many free drinks, much free food, and plenty of entertainment..... But i wasn't done yet..... there was this huge center piece on each of the tables.. and under was a name of the "Employee" who won it. Well, that employee was SUPPOSED to be sitting at that table.... well, I guess Richard Rodriguez didnt feel the need to show up to the party. That being said, I didnt feel bad walking out with his center piece! HA!
So in conclusion... I had a GREAT night with my friends, and got a nice center piece as well!! Id like to encourage you all to find a Christmas party you dont belong at, and enjoy the fun!!! Because it will be just that......Fun!
Later!
Kelly K
Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers.......I HATE YOU!
Yeah so.......I had the pleasure of doing some shopping at my friendly neighborhood Wal-Mart the other day. I was in kind of a hurry and only had a few items.... The store was packed, So I decided my best bet was to get in the "express" self-checkout lanes. Yeah.....not a good plan........
There were two women in front of me. The first one looked like your typical redneck with a whining little kid in the front of her cart. The next woman, directly in front of me, was one of those 'I'm a crotchety over-weight old beotch who always uses the motorized carts' kind of "gal". I should have been more aware of my surroundings before I stepped into this god-forsaken line.
First off, the lady in front was having trouble with the self-checkout. Most rednecks do. I was going to give her the benefit of the doubt, since even the most retarded shoppers can figure it out after a couple minutes. Turns out I shouldn't have.... After five minutes of her attempts at scanning the same items and punching the same buttons on the screen I get a little pissed. Turns out the lane attendant, who looks like she's just been run through by three varsity football teams, has to come over and provide some assistance.
I'm wondering what the hell could cause this kind of hold up. Then I hear lady number one talking to cart lady number two. She's apologizing for taking so long. Cart lady number two says something like "That's okay sweetheart, it's no big deal." I think to myself that, no, its not a big deal. And redneck lady number one is sorry that she's wasting my time like she is.
But then she says one more interesting thing: "I thought my husband gave me more money than this." Oh no she didn't! You're telling me that I'm sitting here going insane because you have to 'un-scan' item after item until your total is an amount you can actually afford?!?!?!
Some of you might say I'm being a little harsh on the lady, but I assure you I am not. I've heard the words "I thought [insert anyone] gave me more money than this" so many times while waiting in checkout lines that I shouldn't have been surprised when lady number one uttered them. See, the people that say that ARE LYING. No one gave them money to come to the store. They just started throwing crap in their cart without budgeting out how much they could actually buy. And because the chicka two people in front of me didn't feel like adding up how much she was spending, I have to wait in the 'express-lane' for an extra 10 minutes.And that my friends, is a lifetime to me in Wal-Mart.
So I collect myself, and watch as the lane attendant 'un-scans' not one, not two, not five, but ten items from the woman's pile of crap. I just shake my head and stand there like a normal dude...... But what happens next makes me want to kill someone!! It involves the comments made by the cart lady directly in front of me.
Let me set this up. The motorized cart lady had been bitching that she couldn't get the motorized cart to work right just a few minutes before the lane attendant came over to help the 'not-enough-money lady' with her order. So motorized cart lady says this "gem" to the lane attendant: "I need you to go to the front of the store and get me another cart. This here one don't work right and it keeps dying on me. So I need you to bring me another cart so I can get my groceries and actually get home!"
I wanted to punch the dumb woman in the back of the head. I wanted to scream at her, "You're 15 feet from the front of the store! You walked in here didn't you?!? You seriously want the only employee within 50 feet of us to walk out into the front foyer, get you another motorized cart, bring it to you, sit there while you switch to the new one, and then drive the one you say doesn't work back to the front of the store???" It would be different if this lady was actually handicapped, or was really old. But she was just another lazy chicka that didn't feel like walking around 'such a big store', which meant she also felt entitled to a motorized cart, and a working one at that.
Just then a self-checkout lane to my left opened up and people behind me started heading for it. I was all like, ha, NOPE! and did my best LaDainian Tomlinson impression elbowing my way to the scanner. So, to make a long story short, 15 minutes after I got in the 'express lane', I checked out my 4 items and paid for them in less than a minute. Lordt....Some people just shouldn't breathe.....
LATER,
Kelly K
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
Posts
